


Yes, Just One

by Star_less



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alien Biology, Dick Jokes, Drabble, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Inspired by Fanfiction, One Shot, Questions, Silly, Slice of Life, The Doctor & Donna Noble Friendship, literally one long dick joke, ten says emphasis on the long
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:00:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22991353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Star_less/pseuds/Star_less
Summary: "Yes, just one!" he blurted, then hesitated and gingerly added, "two would be greedy, don't you think?""Well, you have two hearts," she shrugged, a defensive twinge in her voice. "...You might have two... Like-- I dunno, like an extra one on your back..? Or even none at all, like a blimming Ken doll!" she argued, sheepishly.In the evening, after the adventuring has been done, Donna has a question. She gets an enlightening answer.
Relationships: Tenth Doctor & Donna Noble
Comments: 4
Kudos: 33





	Yes, Just One

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Blanket Fort Talk](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22391863) by [summerartist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/summerartist/pseuds/summerartist). 



> I had this kicking around in my head for a little while and then I read a fic and got inspired to finish it and here it is.

"Do you have one, then?" Donna asked, throwing a Malteaser into her mouth as she leaned against the Doctor. 

It was the evening. They were watching the history channel on TV. Spaceman always had this thing of asking her ten million and one questions when she sat down to watch Coronation Street or Eastenders or Say Yes to The Dress for a blessed hour. By God she loved the man but she liked getting her own back even more. 

"Do I--!? Of course I bloody have one!" The Doctor spluttered, looking down at his companion in disgusted surprise. "Donna, I'm a Time Lord, not-- not E.T!"

"Just one?"

"Yes, just one!" he blurted, then hesitated and gingerly added, "two would be greedy, don't you think?"

"Well, you have two hearts," she shrugged, a defensive twinge in her voice. "...You might have two... Like-- I dunno, like an extra one on your back..? Or even none at all, like a blimming Ken doll!" she argued, sheepishly. "I've never seen it, have I? It's not as if you sit there and go, ooh, hang on Donna, let me whip out my--"

"Excuse _me_ for having to save the Earth!" the Doctor said incredulously, in that high pitched mocking 'The Humans are Being Stupid' voice he had. "You lot, you walk yourself into trouble! I don't have the time to sit there and say ' _ooh, Donna, do you want a look at my--_ "

"A Time Lord with no time," Donna chuckled. 

They fell quiet. The conversation died, except it didn't, it just sort of fizzled around in the background, the pair of them hyper aware of its return. Funnily, in that 'not really funny at all' sort of way, they had talked all the way through the television's segment about supernovas and had hit an ad break. The Doctor reached for some Malteasers.

"...E.T doesn't have one? I really thought he did."

"It's one of those things you'd notice!" The Doctor laughed. 

Donna nodded in agreement. "And it's, you know, in the same place as a human one?"

"I don't know, ask E.T."

Donna elbowed him. "I meant _you_. For all I know it could be, I dunno..."  
She was leaning against him and studied his face intently. Up close, _God_ , he really was so _sodding lanky_. Even in the _face_! A lanky streak of piss, Gramps would say. Like he needed a really decent meal. Chicken pie with mash or something. Mmm. "...on your back or your neck or whatever."

The Doctor laughed softer now, amused. Somehow, just when he thought his humans knew all they needed to about him, they found something different to ask. "Yep." he popped the 'p'. "Same place."

It was quiet again but in an oddly electric sort of way, as though they were both even more aware of the conversation than they were before. "You want to see it, don't you," he asked at last, defeated, not even bothering to seem questioning.

"Yes," Donna said before he had even finished getting all of his 'you' out, grinning.

The Doctor rolled his eyes good naturedly. "Move, then."

(She moved. The Doctor shifted, popped the lowest buttons on his suit jacket, and lowered his waistband.)

"Oooh," said Donna, reverently. Then, slightly more disappointed, she deduced: "Aw, it _is_ just the same."

"What's wrong with it?" the Doctor asked defensively. 

"I thought it'd be, you know..." she gestured, then squinted again. "More impressive."

"Yeah, I missed out when the rest of the Time Lords had theirs gold plated," the Doctor sighed, looking to the heavens. "Nope. Perfectly average. Sticks out a little bit. That's because, you know, we all sort of shared at first," he made a circular gesture with his hand, "five at a time, and then kinda..." he gestured, pulling away with one hand and making a popping sound, "when our parents picked us up. Not quite like you humans, you get yours all to yourself and that's that. Unless you're a twin."

Donna nodded, appeased. Well. She may not have learned anything about supernovas but she would sleep easy tonight knowing that the Doctor did indeed have a bellybutton. 

(And that he was an outie.)

"...do you know E.T, then? E.T ain't real, surely."

The Doctor groaned, tidying his suit. "You just watch your show," he replied, looking around at the floor and kicking at a grate with his Converse so that the TARDIS gave an indignant gurgle. He fumbled to raise a finger. "That was the TARDIS, I'm going to, um, do a-- a thing."

He scarpered, and Donna beamed as she seized the Malteasers. Love Island started in ten minutes!

**Author's Note:**

> I just sort of assumed that the Doctor and the rest of the Time Lords were grown and I had this image of like, five or six at a time sharing one placenta, and that's what he's trying to convey at the end there. I don't even think that's close to being canon, I think they just bump uglies lol but okay this is what I left you guys with so /shrug emoji/


End file.
